Tuesday 31 December 2013

2014 Resolutions

I haven’t made my new years resolutions for 2014 yet, but have been tossing a few ideas around in my head (making sure to floss every day, getting back to my wedding weight/focusing on strength training, learning French, juicing more……).  I thought sitting down to write about them would be the easiest way to hammer out this activity. So I started by reading my resolutions from last year.

Oh....  They’re almost exactly the same as what I was planning to put together for this year.  So of course, this forces some introspection.  Thoughts about willpower.  Musings on the past year.  Here comes a stream of consciousness (it’s basically a tiny novel, but, hey, you’re off work today and tomorrow right? :).

2013 was not the wonderful, easy-breezy, idyllic year I had planned for me and Jeff after our 2012 of scrimping and squinching to get our debt paid off, and the horror that was his (now former) rental property.  Getting Bailey in mid-January was life changing, but at first it was not an all around good life change.  His stomach was an absolute mess from January until the END OF APRIL.  We struggled with different treats, different foods, cooking him white rice and boiled chicken for dinner every night for weeks, withholding wheat, etc. etc. and all seemingly to no avail.  Add onto this the sudden major life changes of having to get up early, walk kilometers and kilometers every day, mostly in the dark dead of winter and blustery winds/snow of the longest winter in history and I was basically a ball of stress between Jan – Apr.  I can’t really remember a time in that window when I felt relaxed.  Even when I was out with friends, I’d sometimes pop home to let him out/check on him to make sure my side entrance wasn’t covered in ... anything… When I took my trip to Florida at the end of March to visit Michelle and “get away from it all”, I thought about Bailey, Jeff and home a lot (though it was a still a pretty ridiculously sweet trip).  I remember having friends over from out of town at the end of April, feeling like the dog’s stomach was finally getting it together, then watching him be horribly sick in the corner of the backyard while my stomach knotted up into a tight ball – it basically ruined my night at the bar, and I nearly punched a bouncer in the face when he made me GO HOME TO GET MY ID (I’m 30 and I’ve been going to Ebar since I was 22 – cut a girl a break, asshole!).  Finally, we found a food/diet regimen that worked for Mr. B, I adjusted to those early mornings (made much better when he wasn’t crated anymore and waking me up by eating his bed every morning at 6:30 a.m.) and things seemed like they were gonna be allllright. 
 
Then shit hit the fan at work in a pretty major way and I spent most of May and June way down in the dumps. In the summer I gave a shoutout to my amazing friends and family for talking me through a really tough situation and being so supportive, but you can never say thank you enough, so thank you, all of you.  I learned a ton from the situation – about myself, about several of my coworkers (who are major facets in day to day life at a place with 30 employees) and about how everything in the world is not always going to work out nicely and be free of drama  - but it’s how you handle it and show resilience and bounce back that makes every crappy situation an opportunity to learn and grow.  Unfortunately, what happened in May/June resulted in me having to take on an additional 2 weeks of fieldwork per month in June, July, August, September, October and November – leaving not much other time for the fieldwork I’d originally planned on, along with my in office work (like.. securing land?  kind of an important part of my new role!!!) or having any sort of work-life balance.  I spent a large number of those months sleeping away from home, working weekends, working 12 hour days, or driving hundreds of kilometers in a day.  I finally came indoors on the evening of November 9, 2013 and have been living a basically perfect, blissful life ever since. ;) I got caught up on house projects, time with friends, time with family, in office work, and slid back into the routine of my “usual” life which I’ve realized is so special because of its simplicity and small joys.  I even was so inspired by all the free time that I decided to challenge myself to be a better person, look into new volunteering opportunities and tackle Jeff’s and my “2013 To Do List” which consists of a crazy number of tasks around the house that Jeff and I ambitiously set for ourselves post-poop-stravaganza with the dog last spring.  It’s been a wonderful 2 months.  But 2 months does not a year make and here is a rather sad report back on my 2013 resolutions:

Juice: I kept up juicing for most of January but because of the cost of one small jug of juice (roughly $8) and the amount of raw material and fibre wasted, I decided it wasn’t sustainable in the long term.  I picked it up again during this Christmas vacation, and really did miss it.  Such a hit of nutrients!  I think I’ll be an “occasional juicer” but won’t add it to my resolutions for 2014 because it’s just too pricey and wasteful for me to rationalize doing more frequently than that.

Learn French: I didn’t touch my French tutorials online again after we picked up Bailey on January 16.  The end of life as I knew it ;)  In late November 2013 I asked bilingual Viv if she would consider teaching me French and she was super into it.  We’ve had 2 lessons, and I’ve learned a lot so far.  This one is definitely back on the resolution list for 2014.

Stand Up for Myself: Done, and done and done and done, in several places in my life.  Success!  Not an easy one, but a muscle I WILL keep flexing for sure.

Floss: Umm.  I still don’t know why I can’t make myself do this.  BACK ON THE LIST!  I need some sort of great inspiration – maybe I’ll put a picture of a pair of gingivitis-y gums up on my bathroom mirror.  Or try to find a new method of WILLPOWER – a system of rewards?  First thing in the morning, I just want to GO and last thing at night I just want to SLEEP!  Does this mean flossing at my desk is the only thing that’s going to work for me!?  Must make it work!  ON THE LIST!

I had to scale down the size of this picture because of how terrifying it is.
Get Back to My Wedding Weight: Well, a big thanks to Mr. Bailey for making sure I’m taking my 10,000 steps every day.  1x – 2x daily walks around our neighbourhood have kept my weight at a reasonable level – usually only about 5 lbs away from the wedding goal weight.  Unfortunately, I’ve noticed my pants aren’t fitting as well and think it’s because after a back injury last spring I stopped lifting weights and doing strength training.  So, instead of setting a number on the scale goal, this year’s weight loss goal is about amount of body fat lost.  And it’s 5 lbs by the end of February (I really want to do it before Crazy Field Season Part II hits, because that 2 weeks of monthly fieldwork in one area PLUS all my other work remains a reality until August 2014).  So: 5 lbs of fat – adios!

Two new additions to the list are:

Read 5 Classic Novels - I read two in one month after I “came inside” in November, so basically I’m pretty amazing ;) Almost done ALL the Brontes!

 
Be a Better Listener – this one is as simple as it sounds – listen, rather than waiting for my turn to speak.  And I find myself frequently relating similar tales/experiences to help a person understand their situation better, but I think sometimes it’s better to just focus on what the other person is saying (and what they’re NOT saying) and help them try to resolve and work out what they’re thinking about.

So, after a semi-disappointing 2013 (and I hope it doesn’t seem like a big string of “excuses” – I’d rather call them “reasons” or “life”) I welcome 2014, a year of learning French, flossing, losing (and maintaining the loss of) 5 lbs of fat, reading 5 classic novels, and being a better listener.

I know you can’t control the madness life throws at you sometimes (and my madness, when put in any sort of perspective was completely minor compared to the things that can happen in this life) but you can control how you react to it, how you stay on track with your goals in the face of it, and how you perceive it – so I will definitely continue to work on all those things, and hopefully grow a little more!
 
Happy New Year!!!
 

Friday 20 December 2013

Winter Hijinks, and Wishes

I'm half an hour early for lunch with my mom on this very rainy Friday in December (nice view while I wait though) so I thought I'd take a moment to reflect on the last little while in these brief moments of quiet before the inevitable hecticness of Christmas returns like an itchy but attractive blanket to wrap itself around me.

I've been keeping it pretty together aside from an embarrassing total wipeout spill in my driveway one unexpectedly icy day.  I ended up landing on one awkwardly bent shin on the ground- auggghwwww! There's also my trunk that doesn't close properly when it's cold outside, which has led to a couple of moments of me having to crawl through the backseat to open it via the 'emergency locked in the trunk release' (designed for kidnapping victims or the very cursed/clumsy?!?). Yesterday was probably the best example of this feat- picture me parked basically at the corner of Yonge and Eglinton, 6 days before Christmas, during lunchtime rush hour, hazard lights on in the right lane waiting for my coworker Kyla to bring me a 6' long sign, and my legs flailing wildly out the back door of the car while I squinch and struggle trying to reach that damn trunk release... Yup... There was the moment on last Sunday's Christmas Bird Count where I watched a fellow birder trip over a snow covered stump and collapse on the ground. I asked if she was ok, she got up, was good, kept hiking. I then immediately tripped over the same stump and collapsed into the snow. Cute and funny right? It was..until I burst out laughing, making my runny nose explode in front of three people I don't know that well. Agggggh Kristyn. Somehow I only fell four times that day, 11 hours of hiking through deep snow and over slippy surfaces, up and down hills. At one point I was even sprinting across an industrial construction site (while wearing $300 binoculars) looking for a snowy owl and I kept upright and all bodily fluids in check. Sometimes balance and coordination do come through for me! The snowy owl though, not so much. For more about this bird who is being spotted all over Ontario this winter, check out here: http://www.natureconservancy.ca/en/what-we-do/resource-centre/featured-species/snowy-owl.html

 
My hijincksy counterparts have not disappointed. Bailey, who hails from the snowy district of James Bay puts his head under the snow about 10x per walk, emerging with a confused but joyful face full of snow. Lately he has regularly been coming out of this pose with a Christmas-sprinkled pretzel or gingerbread stick (we can't figure out what it is). Jeff threw it far away from the sidewalk after pulling it out of Baileys mouth the second time he found it, but Bailey found one right beside the sidewalk with me the other day, leading Jeff and I to create a conspiracy theory about an entire sub-snow Christmas pretzel disposal site on our street.. This morning Bailey was so excited for our walk that he was bouncing vertically, all four paws leaving the ground at once. Very cute, his go to move for sure, but getting a bit too 'full of beans' as the dog walker calls him, he flipped fully over backwards and landed on his stomach facing the other direction. He was stunned, silent and unmoving- for exactly 2 seconds, until he resumed his bouncing, unscathed. Oh to be a dog.

A couple of weeks back Dawn told me her coworker was coining a new phrase: Dawning, but she didn't think he had it quite right (ovetanalyzing with a somewhat pessimistic spin). I agreed with her and said that, to me, Dawning would instead me getting your coat caught in the subway doors, or giving a presentation with toilet paper on your shoe. She wrote back that I was absolutely bang on- earlier that morning she'd presented to a VP with her fly down. I felt honoured to know her so well!

I want to wish everyone a hijincks free holiday and urge you to stay off the roads if they're really messy. Yes Christmas is (somewhat) wonderful and seeing your family is for sure the highlight, but the dangers of driving on icy or snowy roads simply outweigh the joys. Trust me, your family would much rather miss you this Christmas than every Christmas for the rest of their lives. To hosts, please don't put undue pressure on your guests to commute in dangerous conditions.  To guests, use your judgement when setting out on the roads, especially this icy weekend.

To all my friends, be safe, be happy and enjoy the holidays!

Friday 6 December 2013

Good Deeds

This month, I decided to challenge myself to do at least one nice thing per day.  I can't exactly remember where it started - probably with stopping to let a car make a left in front of me at an intersection that is really tough (been there, man - solidarity).. and it felt so nice.  Usually I am a bit of a rushy ass behind the wheel, whirling around the city at top speed, honking, rolling my eyes at incompetence, racing ppl off the line and getting in front of another car just to "claim my spot in line".. a really pointless line, that doesn't really matter at the end of the day, right?  Not sure I'm committing to being a defensive, grandma-like driver for life, but feeling a bit less rushed these days, so that's one place to start. Or was it this buzzfeed list that brought a tear to my eye: http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/the-world-isnt-such-a-bad-place?  (I think it was the kid's letter to the vet particularly.. omg...)  Just realizing it's up to each of us to try to make this world a better place.  I'm not sure I want to get to the end of my life and reflect on just how tidy my kitchen was, or how handy my new closet shelving is, or how long a nap I managed to take today.  These things are great, but some days I feel like I'm living this massively selfish extravagant life (because I have the time and means to organize my closet.. hmmm.. I am not much of an adventurer!).

Some mini good deeds to date:

I emptied all the change in my wallet into the Salvation Army guy's thing (what is that thing?  a donation bubble?  donation fishbowl?)  There were $50 bills in that fishbowl - I had to look twice to make sure they were real! Then I gave a bunch of dimes and pennies.  Small, but hopefully it helps someone.

I spent some of my lunch break the other day chatting with a recent grad looking to get into the environmental field - 4 years of reviewing 400-1,000 resumes every February gave me some idea of what looks good on a resume, so I hope my advice was helpful.

I donated to my dog walkers' pet food drive that they were organizing this Christmas.  That one was my favourite so far - I love thinking of a pooch being made happy by cookies he probably never gets to eat. Because when times are tough, understandably, dog treats go straight to the bottom of the grocery list.

These things are great.. but also tough in a way because you want to do MORE.. but I guess you have to be realistic.  I'm not made of dog treat money.  So I guess you just do what you can!

This week I got involved in Freecycle which is basically the antidote to Kijiji.  Jeff and I put stuff on Kijiji frequently - snow tires (because we seem to constantly be shedding cars?!), foosball table (still unsold 5 years later.. anyone have a hankering to play some table soccer with tiny men... EVERY DAY?  NO?!  shocking!), car parts from his Jetta (RIP Jetta - 2001-2011 - car parts have made it live on in a zombie-like state for the past 2.5 years), old couch, etc. etc. - and the million annoying inquiries we get that go nowhere, the no-shows, the petty bartering (from Dutch Jeff as well as the interested parties! :P), and nonstop text messages back and forth - it's exhausting.  Freecycle on the other hand is you posting items you no longer want/need of likely lower value (e.g. old cork bulletin board, now unused pine end table/nightstand, extra DVD player from 2003) and you get these wonderful messages from people like a guy helping out his friend who recently got divorced and was left with nothing - how a DVD player would make her and her son's Christmas - come pick it up buddy!  I also threw in an old lamp for him today (my good deed for the day) which I'm sure I could have found a home for somewhere, but would obviously be much more appreciated by this woman than in my over-lamped house.  I also heard from a place that is working to support the over 400 people who were recently laid off from a plant in Fergus and was so happy to donate the corkboard to them.  So instead of Kijiji-induced rage/apathy/disappointment in humanity, I felt distinctly warm and fuzzy (not to mention my closet is now even less cluttered and more organized.. omg.. I'm so boring!!!!).
This took hours. "Before" picture withheld for a reason! ;)
With most of my Freecycle goods picked up and my house in this state of extreme organization I'm going to have to get creative for my good deeds for the rest of the month!  Anyone have any ideas? 

I wish I could give tons more money/goods to charity (and not just the one I work for) - that is an ongoing frustration.  Perhaps one day I'll win the lottery (right Dave, Kate, Pam, James, Dawn and Viv?) and be able to make it rain everywhere!

If anyone wants to join me for my December challenge, I'd love to share ideas and accomplishments!  I already have my mom and Jeff stepped up to the challenge with me, which is great! I'm hoping I can consciously continue it through to 2014 and beyond! Stay tuned..

Tuesday 12 November 2013

The Need to be Liked

What.  The hell. Is with this.

I have absolutely no useful insights on this topic.  I generally don't write about things I don't think I have the answer to.  This one is truly "off the top of my head" and I'm basically just thinking out loud. This one is hard to write.

We're taught not to care what other people think, and live lives for ourselves.  We're taught to do what we think is right and follow our hearts and our guts.  To live life "for you" while at the same time being a good person.  I love all these ideas.  But implementing them, day after day, and not following the seemingly natural instincts of wanting to make other people happy, make friends, please people and all the weird permutations those ideas can lead to is REALLY HARD!

Where does this come from?  Again, I have no answers.  Is it ingrained in children?  I picture Mrs. Seinfeld repeating "how can anybody not like him!".  But what I admired most about Jerry was that he simply didn't care, and he really did live his life for him, even if it meant being a jerk.  Cuz maybe he was a jerk.  He was just doing him - and that's ok!  It takes all types for this world to go around.  Affinities, friendships, relationships, dislikes, frenemies, enemies - all these things are inevitable and you're likely not just going to have ones in the "happy" categories.  So why rage against what's going to happen in some incessant battle to make all your interactions positive?

Well frig, it just feels great when you get along great with everyone.  It's, sadly, one of my biggest wishes in life - that things can be easy breezy, drama free, we all get along and everyone just loves each other. Sad because it's so hard to "come true".  I'm thinking about my staff retreats - the 2012 National staff retreat (remember crowd surfing?) and the 2013 Ontario Region strategic planning session in which was basically a giant love-in to the point where the facilitator commented just how nice a group we were (aww).  On the other side of the coin, I think about the 2012 staff retreat where I was yelled at by a previously cited coworker in front of all my other coworkers and I don't have quite such warm and fuzzy feelings.  Because it sucks when there's hate and ill will going on, and it's lovely and synergistic and good vibes build on good vibes when everyone gets along!  So you can see why I aspire to it. Who wouldn't rather the latter scenario than being yelled at?!

But... as much as I have been working to breathe the bad people in, forgive them, and let them go, I myself have an incredibly short fuse when it comes to people driving me bananas.  Being super sensitive and having really high standards doesn't make me the easiest person to please!  So guess what.. I don't like some people.

SO WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO LIKE ME!?

The answer, clearly, is "they don't!".  My sage personal Buddha and loyal blog reader Erica (whose blog is so much prettier than mine!) framed it perfectly earlier this year: "not everyone is going to like you.  and that's ok." I think getting ok with it is the only real solution, and therefore, of course, inevitably, the real challenge.

Isn't it funny how some people rub other people just the wrong way?  There are some people I can just never seem to get my footing right with and I'm always aware of them just not quite loving me.  And there are people who drive me bonkers who will just never get it right with me.  I think just in writing this I'm seeing what a two way street this is, and it makes it better somehow - I think it's the key to the answer. 

The people who I don't really like aren't bad people - they aren't a mar on society - I don't wish they would disappear into a hole (or be banished to a deserted island, which is what I used to secretly wish upon people in high school - I put them all on the island together to torture one another.. muahahaha. at that time there were like at least 10-15 people!! happy to say the island's real estate market has opened up a bit since then) - it's just that they rub me the wrong way, affect my sensitive sensibilities or maybe just aren't "for me".  So why is it such an affront when you can tell someone doesn't like you?  I'm not exactly the quietest, least opinionated person in the room.  I can imagine I can be quite grating, especially after a few drinks (my husband informed me that during my birthday celebration last week I was screaming "WHAT COAT AM I GOING TO WEAR TONIGHT!  I CAN'T PICK A COAT!" - totally unnecessary, annoying and ridiculous!).  I bet even my highly introspective and self-based blog entries annoy people (don't anyone dare agree with that statement as a comment on my wall, I'll kill you! ;)).  I get that I'm not everyone's cup of tea.  I can see this type of off-the-bat, just-not-feeling-you reaction when my dog meets other dogs in the park.  Some dogs he instantly wants to play with, will bounce in circles, beg them to chase him.  Other dogs: one sniff and he's out of there.  He might even get growly if said dog tries to play with him.  Bailey is very firm in who he does and doesn't like, and he has an approximate IQ of 4.  So maybe it's a biological thing? In which case I should clearly just stop writing and thinking aloud about it and give in to letting the chemicals rule our interactions!

I just read Sheryl Sandberg's book Lean In and was bummed during the chapter that pronounced that the more successful you get at your job, the less people will like you, particularly as a woman (URGH).  I recently became a manager at my job and have aspirations for higher long-term goals.  So do I just get down with the fact that people won't like me? Maybe someday I'll be high up enough and scary enough that anyone who doesn't like me will be too scared to act like it?! Just kidding.. because I will still know... I'm quite intuitive, you realize! Not to mention there's about zero opportunity for growth at my organization so I'm not going anywhere anytime soon!

I think overall it would be damn good and healthy to spend less time thinking about who does and doesn't like you.  Who the fuck cares anyways! (said in a happy voice!).  You only get one go at this life, YOLO if you will, and at the end of the day I certainly don't want to remember shedding tears over people who didn't like me and wasting that time by NOT spending it in a quality way with people who love me.

I do my best to be a good person (wife, daughter, friend, coworker, etc.), to be kind, to serve the world when I can, to listen, to take furry people for really long walks, to abide by my own moral code and to be good while being me (which is not exactly this perfect effigy described above! ha!).  If we all do our best to be our best selves, then won't the chips fall naturally where they will?  Friendships will form, some will recede, some will resurge; alliances will build, break; affinities will wane and wax - but it will all be the way it's "supposed to be" because we're all being us - constantly changing throughout our lives, meaning that these relationships will inevitably change as well.. but as long as you have a few key people you love and who love you, isn't that all we need?

I can see from this rambling I have some neat ideas.  Implementing them and making them a part of my day to day consciousness, that's another thing entirely!  I guess a good start is blogging about them. :)

I'm always on a quest to better myself.  My next goal - being 100% proud of the me I am so I can be more ok when, inevitably, someone does not want to chase me at the dogpark.

Sunday 22 September 2013

The Fog Always Lifts

This August Jeff and I set out on a two week east coast roadtrip, determined to see everything there was to see in Quebec City, all of New Brunswick, the entire island of PEI and all of that beautiful Nova Scotia, from Digby Neck to the Cabot Trail.  Lots of warnings from friends and family who had travelled down east met the news of our trip “I hope the weather holds for you” “aye, I remember the Cabot Trail – couldn’t see a bloody thing!” (I don’t know who that Scottish-toned person is but they look like this in my mind:
)

and “oh, Halifax.  Would have been nice to see the waterfront but it rained the whole time.”  Regardless, we checked the long term forecast, gave each other the thumbs up and set out.

And, with the weather gods apparently on our side, we were met with brilliant sunshine all but four days.  The first was our epic drive from Quebec City to Miramichi, NB.  There were parts of that drive where it was raining buckets, other parts where it was just spitting, and long stretches of simply eerie fog snaking through the mountains.  The only activity hindered by the damp was ziplining over Grand Falls in Grand  Falls, NB.  I was epically disappointed as this place was just amazing:
 
Maybe sometime we’ll have a chance to return to NB and go for it!  I think still-getting-over-lifelong-fear-of-heights Jeff was secretly relieved he didn’t have to cling for dear life to a slippery cable over the crashing waters and jagged rocks.  I had a dream of a sunset dinner overlooking the Miramichi River from our hotel restaurant that night.  We brought our bags in in the absolute pouring rain L.  But, as I looked out the hotel room window over the majestic river, I could see clear skies peeking at me from the east and suddenly there were traces of golden light lighting the river and the post-rain fog was dissipating as we watched.  I just about got my wish of the sunset dinner, with the added bonus of seafood pasta featuring famous Miramichi salmon, watching Jeff drinking blueberry beer and birds darting over the river.

The second was our transitioning from PEI to Nova Scotia day.  We ambitiously decided to drive from Cabot Head Provincial Park on the north shore to Annapolis Royal, just west of Digby in the NW of Nova Scotia.  It was a cloudy, foggy morning as we packed up our camping gear and set off on our “scenic” south shore drive.  You could make out a lighthouse or two across a harbour, but mostly it was a pretty gloomy day. 
 
Once again, the fog changed to an epic downpour at points, including of course when we had to run to and from the grocery store and in and out of our cabin.  The rain ceased long enough that night so I could do a load of laundry (hijinx break?  I drove to the laundry room, saw it was coin operated, drove back to the main office for change, put the change in the dryer instead of the washer (who puts the dryer on the left!!!), drove back to the main office for more change, drove back to the laundry room (got yelled at by a woman to SLOW DOWN – don’t worry lady, my night wouldn’t have been “made” by hitting your kid with my car, that’s in no one’s best interest), put my wash in, lost the money I’d put in the dryer (10 minute max window?  We’ll never know), drove back to the cottage, back to the laundry room to switch the stuff into the dryer, and back later to pick it up.  I was very tired of doing laundry by that point.  Sidenote Jeff had slept for 2 hours while camping, then drove for 10 hours, so he was asleep sitting up on the couch at 8:10 p.m., true story) but when we woke up the next morning, the fog was heavy in the air.  Uh oh.  It was whale watching day.  You can’t see whales in the fog!! 
 
On Digby neck the fog seemed to have a life and agenda of its own. One side of the neck of land was perfectly sunny while the other was drowning in fog.
Fog
 
No fog

Of course where our whale boat was taking off from was insanely foggy – you could actually feel it on your face.  Jeff took a picture of this lighthouse (see above) that was barely visible as we set off from shore.  Then, suddenly, somehow , as our boat blazed through the Bay of Fundy, we broke through the curtain of fog into the most brilliantly sunny day I’ve ever seen.  Something about the dark, dark blue of the Atlantic ocean can make a day seem exponentially more gorgeous than a regular sunny day spent anywhere else.  I feel so lucky we passed that curtain of fog and broke out into the blue skies, because whale watching was absolutely unreal!  Highlights were two humpback whales who I swear had been trained by the whale boats – rising, diving, breaching and doing barrel rolls.  One barrel roll happened 10m from our boat.  Being so close to a whale that you can smell stinky whale breath is pretty incredibly awesome.  My biggest sympathy for the whales is the way barnacles hitch a ride on their tails and bodies – can you imagine how freaking itchy it would be to have a barnacle attached to you at all times.  No wonder the whales were slapping their huge fins in the water as hard as they were – possibly dislodging a barnacle or two in the process.

Barnacled Humpback
Our third foggy day hit us as we stretched way up into the northwest part of Nova Scotia: the Cabot Trail.  We woke up to fog and the promise of a 90% chance of rain all day all over Cape Breton.  Great.  The one day we allotted ourselves to do this beautiful scenic drive and it’s not even going to be visible?  We crept up the highlands and found ourselves deep in the fog.  Breathing it, feeling the droplets on your cheeks, watching the collection of moisture drip off nearby lampposts – it was foggy.  We were still able to make out hills, mountains and a few scenic peeks at the sea, but for sure the visibility was reduced. 
 
Then, suddenly, the gray skies just seemed to get brighter.  I swear I could see one particularly concentrated area of bright. We pulled off at the next lookout and there it was – the sun!  Doing its very best to break through the clouds.  And it did!  By the time we got to the next stop the sky was a tumultuous mix of clouds and fog being burned off by a gleaming yellow sun in a perfect blue sky.
 
And by the afternoon, it was an undeniably perfect sunny day that had me reaching for my sunscreen.  We enjoyed the lovely weather as we made our way along the Cabot trail and back down the highlands into the south part of Cape Breton.  It clouded over again, but I am eternally grateful we got to see the views we did.  Many of them made my list of “most beautiful things I’ve ever seen”.  It gets longer with every trip we take.  It’s a gorgeous, wild, and often sunny world out there to explore!

A nice metaphor for life, perhaps, that no matter how dark, gloomy or unsettled things seem, the sun is under there somewhere, and will, in time, burn through the fog and find you again.

Monday 16 September 2013

Concert High

 Last night I had the absolute pleasure of FINALLY seeing one of my favourite bands since 2006, Panic! at the Disco, along with openers Twenty One Pilots and headliner Fall Out Boy.  I've seen Fall Out Boy twice already but find their new album to be the most ridiculously catchy thing that ever existed, so needless to say I was crazy excited.

I've never heard of Twenty One Pilots.  But they were wearing ski masks.  And singing songs with pretty decent social messages.  So I was in! Jeff and I agreed they weren't bad at all, though we only arrived in time to see two songs.

Then we waited for my buddy Brendon Urie and Panic! to take the stage.  It was raining at Echo Beach, but Jeff and I hardly noticed.  An all standing venue, on beach sand, surrounded by kids average age perhaps 18... but we didn't feel old.. we just felt excited.  Ok so part of this excitement could possibly be attested to the fact that the opening band was done before 8 p.m. meaning we'd be able to see good long sets from Panic! and FOB and still manage to make it home in time for Jeff to clock some shuteye before his 14 hour day at work today.  Yes.. so we're old. But whatever works to get you PUMPED! :D

When Brendon took the stage and started with "It's Time to Dance", I was transported back to 2007 instantly.  I had just downloaded that song and was playing it over and over again on my iPod on my drive to work at my shiny new job.  This was exactly 6 years ago... ack!  Time really flies.  "Well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor just for the attention.. cuz that's just ridiculous.."  Jeff and I had fun answering "WEDDING" to the prompt of "SHOTGUN", singing at the top of our lungs with all the other kiddies.  They played my current fave, the single Miss Jackson (B's dancing in this video originally sold me hard on this song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUc_jXBD9DU - I often try to emulate his moves while Bailey and I are out hiking.. results likely laughable!).  They played their new single, a couple from their last album which was good but not comparable in my eyes to A Fever You Can't Sweat Out or Pretty. Odd, and me and Jeff's Rock Band stardom song, Nine in the Afternoon.  Most of you who are reading this and going "..who is this band?" will remember I Write Sins Not Tragedies as their breakthrough single http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc6vs-l5dkc and if you watched music videos (like I did when I was a rich and lazy master's student!) you'll remember the world's creepiest wedding guests and yet another video where Brendon where eyeliner and a top hat.  He is also into shiny jackets, which he was wearing last night.  If there's one key to my heart, it's a sparkly item of clothing.  So ya, anyways, I can't stop laughing about the ridiculousness of all of us getting prompted to sing the start of I Write Sins - "what a beautiful wedding..." ending with "the poor groom's bride is a whore!" and Brendon brings the mike back to his lips, laughing and exclaims "she's such a slut!" then burst into the "I chime in" verse and goes on singing.  He kept sliding back and forth on the stage, in his sparkly jacket, taking advantage of the slippery drops of rain, and warning us to please laugh at him when he inevitably falls.  Which he didn't, because I'm fairly certain he's super human.  And he ended his set with a backflip off the drummer's platform down onto the stage.  Stuck it. Loved it.  I was so freaking happy.  Great songs that brought back lovely memories, and an awesome singer, completely kooky and fun, too easy to picture singing in the spotlight next to a piano at a lounge in the 20s with his beautyful rich voice.  I had a blast singing every last word.

Fall Out Boy was solid, for sure.  Their shows have gotten significantly showier since I first saw them in 2007 - more lights, more video, more planned "stunts" - but hey, it was awesome!  I'm happy to have someone put on a show for me.  I thought their first few song selections were weak, but was thrilled when they started to play a few off their new album, especially Young Volcanoes which I danced my ass off to in the sand and the rain.  Dance Dance was more 2005 nostalgia - I drew the heart a la 2005 Patrick (you have to watch the video or have a good memory to know what I mean http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6MOKXm8x50).  They have a pretty solid selection of songs.  Patrick has definitely gotten way more cute/fun/confident over the years too.  But, sadly, my heart still belongs to Pete Wentz - my devastating crush on him when I was 22 was embarrassing enough at the time .. it's significantly moreso now.  Especially when juxtaposed with holding hands with my husband LOL.  But alas, Kristyn will be Kristyn. ;)  And of course during the show I couldn't stop laughing in my head about this:
"Fall Out Boy", 2007 (Photo by: Dave Cristo)
There were all sorts of kind of cool videos playing on the big screen behind the guys - during Save Rock and Roll they showed pictures of amazing artists through time and encouraged everyone in the audience to create, make music, etc..  Jeff and I cheered for pics of artists we loved like Kurt Cobain, and Jeff lost his voice yelling "ya!" when they showed Tupac and Biggie. Lol.  There was a long video segment that was confusing and it was really dark for a good few minutes while we all watched it, wondering where it was leading.  Then, all of a sudden, there is screaming directly behind me and the guys (sans drummer) have set up maybe 15 feet behind us and are starting to play a lovely, soft version of I'm Like a Lawyer With the Way I'm Always Trying to Get you Off (yes).  Being so close to them (to Pete?) brought tears to my eyes.  I was so happy. Tall Jeff snapped a couple of pics, just to show how close we actually were for those few songs, including a sing a long to Where Is Your Boy Tonight - just amazing!  I like to hope when they asked us to sing Patrick heard me, and pictured the likeness of the girl in the picture above (lol).

Photo: An unexpected awesome surprise when FOB popped up for an acoustic jam 15 feet behind us! Fourth row baby! :) then back to 80th row. Lol. Great show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Almost best seats in the house - for 3 songs!

Probably my biggest FOB surprise was when they covered Drake's Hold on We're Going Home.  They called him a hometown hero (haha Wheelchair Jimmy).  Cool, I like Drake.  I don't think the target audience was quite right though, lots of derision (including from Jeff haha).  And another great surprise was when they brought Mr. Sparkly Jacket back on stage to do the vocals for 20 Dollar Nosebleed, a Fall Out Boy song that I have ALWAYS ADORED, and until last night had no idea he was the guest/lead vocalist on.  No wonder I liked it so much! Listening to it today I can't believe I didn't realize it sooner! Before he left the stage, he did another backflip.  Excellent.

My main "hrrrrrmmm" about the FOB set was Pete's little interludes of talking between songs.  I sort of wish he would just keep his pretty mouth shut.  At one point, trying to encourage kids to embrace music he managed to compare FOB's Save Rock and Roll album to Green Day's Dookie (come on, Pete).  And he kept referencing all the "kids in the crowd" who "just don't fit in" and people "just don't get you - but I feel that, man, no one ever got me either".  Jeff and I just looked at each other and laughed.  We lamented our mortgage, steady jobs and marriage and just how well we fit in to life in general.. dammit! ;)  There were some definite freaks around us.  Good for them.  I hope the freaks find comfort in the music.  I know I have at lower points in my life (Bang the Doldrums basically healed me after a cruddy breakup) - and I'll always be a bit of a weirdo at heart (and on the surface.. and in extremely detailed blog posts about concerts attended mainly by teenagers).

Amazing, amazing show overall.  The energy, especially from Panic! (did I mention the bassist was also wearing a sparkly shirt, and their big sign behind the stage was sparkly too?) was contagious.  I went home in the most fabulous of moods, after being a bit in the dumps yesterday, and have been riding my Concert High all day long.  Cleaning out the fridge, dusting the house and vacuuming up another mountain of dog hair today were tasks made much more enjoyable by dancing and singing at the top of my lungs, reliving my favourite parts of the show (yes, I will now insert "she's such a slut!" into I Write Sins every time I sing it! - I'm all class, for the record).  I didn't even notice the rain.  Just the tunes, the good vibes, and Pete Wentz' smile (KIDDING).

And I can't finish up my concert post without mentioning seeing Alan Doyle at Jackson Triggs winery's amphitheatre last Friday night.  He's the lead singer of Great Big Sea, for the unenlightened (!!), and does some solo stuff.  He was incredible.  I dare anyone to go acapella (spell check is suggesting "scapula" to replace that - I'm going to leave it...) all alone on stage, nothing but your voice and a glass of wine, and sound anything like Alan.  He is unreal!  My mom and I both got misty eyed during one of his ballads, about what else, a sailor, the sea and his love back home.  Le sigh!  A wonderful week of concerts.

Have you seen your favourite band lately!?  If not, I would strongly recommend it for filling your soul and putting a huge smile on your face, and kooky dance in your step.

Tuesday 3 September 2013

Trip Highlights


In Quebec City we wandered cobbled streets

Admired centuries of history

Dined at an authentic Italian restaurant

Where a French waiter and two significantly Anglo Ontarians tried to find common ground

Stayed at a hotel on a lake that we never had time to see

And picnicked on cheese and baguette while the Vinyl Café played on the radio

 

In New Brunswick we hopped into inner tubes

Strapped to one another, and also to our cooler

We cracked a cold beer as our feet dangled in the cold river

And floated peacefully down the Miramichi

I definitely crashed into the trees hanging over the riverbank at one point

And we laughed

 

On the south shore of New Brunswick we walked on the ocean floor

The tide was out, the tourists were in

And the Hopewell Rocks were as towering and majestic as anything had ever been

Cinched at the waist, busty ladies in corsets gathered together

100 feet over the rest of us, looking down

Eroded by the endless ocean

Hugged by bubble wrap seaweed, floating and clinging then squinting against the bright sun

Until the tide returned

 

We ate salmon in Miramichi

Lobster in Shediac (Acadian style, of course!)

We dined on mussels, clam chowder and more lobster in New Glasgow, PEI

We savoured Digby scallops on Digby neck – warmed on a toasted hot dog bun, somehow the greatest meal I have ever tasted

Lobster rolls and scallop encores in Lunenburg

1.5 lbs of lobster and fresh salmon near Peggy’s Cove

Oysters, lobster and haddock in Halifax

Deep fried everything in Antigonish – the ocean floor in a fryer, then on our plates

Steamed clams (steamed hams?) fresh from the ocean in Portland, Maine

And $1/piece oysters for Jeff

On my to do list: getting fresh seafood shipped to Ontario for minimal cost… (suggestions welcome!)

 

On PEI we clapped, sang and stomped at a ceilidh

Fiddlers fiddled, step dancers stepped, trumpets blared

Jokes flowed

Songs sung – from the beloved Stompin’ Tom, to Mike the ceilidh guy’s “ol’ belly rubber” which made this big weenie cry

Bald eagles flew overhead nonchalantly

Herons clustered together in flocks

Where were we!?

 

Lighthouses, lighthouses, lighthouses

From gorgeous, to run down, to ugly, to lonely, to majestic

From red, to white, to black

Beacons on every point

Everywhere

(Lighthousemoon?)

 

Whale watching off Digby Neck

The humpback whale barrel roll

Fins of minkes all around

Brilliant sun 1, pervasive fog 0

Did I mention the scallop rolls?

 

Touring the west coast and the Acadian villages

Blue, red, white flags, yellow star

Pride in history, unchanging for centuries

Views of the ocean

“I could live here”

 

Lunenburg, so colourful, so quaint, so adorable

The perfect fishing town

Tall colourful architecture here, the Bluenose II over there

And a harbour full of sailboats under a shining sun

The bluest water I have ever seen

 

Peggy’s Cove

Pink granite, blue water, shining sky

Lighthouse perfection

Clambering on rocks, waves crashing all around

Feeling so unbelievably at home

 

Halifax.  Waterfront.  Could have set up a shop and moved right onto the boardwalk, never leaving

Or could have stayed a year at the Keith’s brewery where folks in period costumes danced and sung

Could have spent every night for the rest of my life listening to Signal Hill at the Lower Deck, while the good beer flowed

Could have stayed there and never left, I’m sure of it (NCC Atlantic, are you hiring?)

 

Laying on a beach

This was worth not taking the long route

To find this time to relax

The coldest, saltiest water

Nothing more refreshing

The warm, reddish sand

Quiet, reading, relaxing

“We need to find time to do more of THIS” says Jeff

 

Cape Breton

My history, my blood

The Cabot Trail and the most beautiful vistas in the world

Winding on a road up a mountain

While the sea opened up below

Climbing further and further up

Green hills that went on forever

Fiddle music pulsing in my veins

 

Time with Jeff

A commodity there just isn’t always enough of

Two weeks, 7,500 kms, countless stops, always on the move

Coming, going

Cabins with salamander guests, hotel rooms in 4 provinces and 1 state

Feeling at home the entire time, because my home was right beside me, driving the car and smiling at me

 

A wonderful. Spectacular. Unforgettable. Exhausting. Brilliant two weeks.

Canada’s east coast - perfection

Monday 15 July 2013

Summer Hijinx are the Hijinxiest of All

Field season is at the "ready to kill ya" point which explains my absence over the past little while.  But I'm bursting with stupid stories, and just had to make a point to make some time tonight to post.  Between the stupid, the awesome and the terrible, I'll try to paint an adequate picture of the past couple of months in not more than a couple paragraphs! (ha, brevity, never my strong point..)

I had the roughest go I've had at work since I started my job nearly six years ago, which did a pretty decent job at sucking my thoughts into a spiralling crazylady vortex for most of May and June.  When it comes to just me, gettin' my work done, doin' my thing, meeting my deadlines, I'm bang on. That is when I flourish.  When you add people to the mix it always makes things trickier.. especially when you add ones who detest you, don't respect you, lie about you (um, yup, that's all one person), I get thrown totally off kilter.  Dealing with people, especially when their motives toward you are.. using synonym feature to find right word.. "sinister" too harsh.. let's just say "untoward"... can really do a number on your head, making you question yourself and your decisions.  The good news is I kept treading water with the help of my wonderful friends and family who are so supportive and I am so grateful for every day; I kept my head above the proverbial water, murky as it was, and I made it out of the deep end and have climbed out of the cesspool.  I am moving on from that toxic swimming pool and doing everything I can to put it behind me.  Like an angry fire-breathing whack-a-mole, I'm sure this person will pop up again in my life, but hopefully I'll be in a better position to breathe in, breathe out, shake my head and laugh a little, and continue moving forward.

My allergies have been pretty redonculous this season; not sure about the rest of you grass pollen allergy sufferers, but I really think this has been one of the worst years for pollen allergies on the record.  I knew it was bad.  Then I decided to walk through a field of 5'5" tall grass.  I know exactly how tall it was because it was hitting me in the eyes and mouth as I walked.  If I'd put on my rubber boots I could have walked on the submerged trail, but I hate having wet feet for the drive home and was only in hikers, so I thought dry feet + field of grass sounded like a much better idea.  I started sneezing.. 3 sneezes (usually I just pull out a double). Then 5-6 sneezes.  When I was at one point bent over letting out a chorus of 12 consecutive sneezes and my face subsequently exploded, I decided I probably shouldn't continue to blaze my way down the grass path.  As I reached my car on the return journey I noticed it felt like I had something in my throat - grass seed?  Not sure.  Ouch.  Itchy.  Can't tell.  Cough cough.. ouch.  What the heck.  Deep breath.. having trouble breathing.. Oh, I see, it's just my throat closing up.  Nice.  That was a terrifying 15 minutes as I drove in a panic along Hwy 90 practicing breathing and painfully coughing.  Luckily after blasting AC at my face for the 1.5 hr drive home, I was in decent condition, and promptly made an apt with an allergist.  Hopefully 2013 will be my last year of face explosions: tbd!

View from Sneezefest 2013 - at least it was worth it!

I went out to spray Dog-strangling Vine, my favourite nemesis, for a week at the end of June.  I led a team of 8-9 people each day and we did a serious number on this plant, helping to keep it off some very important habitat - ya us!  I only gave one person heat exhaustion, 2 people funny foot rashes from wearing rubber boots in 35C heat (nope, it can NEVER be a reasonable temperature when I'm spraying) and maybe ended up with a team of 5 down from 9 on Day 4.. but we persevered!  To celebrate near the end of Day 4 (final spray day), I looked over at one of the team members who was fiddling with the straps on her backpack sprayer while holding the spray trigger on the nozzle and was promptly greeted with a face full of Roundup.  Watching it come towards me in a blue, slow motion arc through the air was something else!  It smacked me in the forehead, eye and cheek on the right side of my face and I looked at one of our other interns, who was panic stricken.  "Do you want paper towel?!!?  LET'S GET YOU SOME PAPER TOWEL!".  I replied "I need you to get the handwash water and wash out my eye right now."  I sort of fell to my knees while she started pouring clean water in my eye and across my face.  At that point, there wasn't much else to do but laugh and her controlled freak out was kind of hilarious.  So I started laughing as she poured, which made it sound like I was choking on the water that was pouring on my face.  An intern who had been around the front of the van came to the back to see what the commotion was about and could only utter: "Laura, why are you waterboarding Kristyn?!?!"  Which made me laugh harder, which is when another intern showed up and thought to himself: "Laura is doing a really bad job at giving Kristyn a drink of water from that jug...".  Which he later shared, which made me waterboard laugh again later.  We spent the rest of the day retelling that story and laughing until our stomachs hurt.  Just after that I went to call my parents to tell them the funny story and apparently can't handle holding two phones and a beer, as I poured the beer all over my shirt, my pillow and the bed I was to sleep in that night.  Ahh. The perfect end to a dreamy week ;)


Badass 2013 Spray Team
Last weekend I headed to Cedar Point in Sandusky, OH.  This is our annual trip of roller coaster awesomeness that we missed in 2012 and I have since vowed NEVER to miss a year again.  I missed it so much I'd find myself staring misty-eyed into the distance thinking about the twists and turns of Maverick (two launch starts, a drop that's greater than 90 degrees - yup picture it, like a backwards "S" (ride that S from the right), a two minutes of crazy barrel rolls and thrills), the fastest you'll EVER accelerate and probably EVER go from 0mph - 120mph on Top Thrill Dragster, and the 300 foot sheer drop on Millennium Force, then catching air on hills overlooking Lake Erie.  Basically, the happiest place on earth.  Somehow it's never really rained on us before.   A bit during our trip in 2007, but never REALLY rained.  We had a great morning in the hot hot sun, rode all the goodies and were planning our next moves when we saw the sky getting a bit funny.  We made it right to the front of the line for Magnum XL and then were told the ride was shutting down due to incoming weather.  Ok, time for a beer!  Then in line for Maverick for an hour and a half waiting for it to run again, which it just does not do in the rain because of the launches.  Ok, let's head to dinner!  We got sprinkled on on the way to dinner, and when Viv and I felt the subzero AC temperature of the restaurant we made the executive decision to walk the 7 minutes to and from the car to get some dry long sleeved shirts to change into.  We didn't want to get chilled then be cold all night.  Nice plan ladies.. instead we got SOAKED in the storm that would eventually flood Toronto that day.  We were soaked RIGHT THROUGH.  Right through.  At one point there was nothing to do but laugh.  Or maybe I said "this will be one of those things we think back on and laugh about" :P  When we showed up back at the restaurant looking like two drowned rats, Jay and Jeff (warm and drinking their beers inside) just sort of stared at us in feel sorry for you/kind of funny/oh my disbelief.  The restaurant folks who gave us towels to go towel ourselves down in the bathroom were very nice.  We drank some tea to warm up, changed into the dry shirts (thank goodness for plastic bags) and made it through the rest of the evening no problem, even though we were extremely wet from butt to feet!  Anyone interested in riding the best rides of your life, plan to be IN for Cedar Point 2014 - all welcome! (sidenote: Viv and Jeff laughed like maniacs for their first time over the 420' off the ground arc of Top Thrill Dragster - there is nothing like your first time!)
Millennium Force - pic from the line.  That's a HUGE bitch!


Top Thrill Dragster against the sunset (photo by Jay).
420 feet of magic straight up and down.  Vroom.. VROOM......

Sidenote: our campsite for the weekend was under big shady trees, so typically that would be "dirt".  For this particular weekend post all the summer rain, it was "mud".  Mud which we a) skated in b) slid in c) dropped steak AND vegetables in.  Mud which I refused to brave at 4 a.m. when the rain was pouring buckets onto our tent.  You know you have a good husband when he agrees you shouldn't go out there, hands you an empty Powerade bottle and goes back to sleep.  A saint, my Jeff!  Not my finest moment THAT'S FOR SURE.  I hope that very embarrassing factoid at least made somebody laugh - if so, it was worth it.

Bailey has started swimming, which is very fun and cute and probably very useful for a dog wearing a black fur coat in 30C+ weather.  It's been great taking him to the dogpark so he can cool down and fetch sticks - he's a great swimmer!  Yesterday morning while hiking with Bailey, my mom, Ziggy and my mom's friend Art and his two dogs, Bailey got lost - in Stouffville, in a giant forest, quite far from home, somewhere he's never been.  We called and called for a good 5 minutes before he finally came back - completely out of breath, soaked from head to toe and looking a little panicked.  We'll never know what happened.  I'd like to put a GPS tracker on his collar, even if just to see where he goes on these expeditions!
Bailey (front, black) swimming with his lunchtime buddies at Guelph Lake today (photo cred: Busy Bee Critter Sitters)
This past weekend I got to attend an event at Little McCoy Island way up near Pointe au Baril in Georgian Bay.  Fantastic day, beautiful weather, lovely people and to top it all off, there was a moose swimming across a channel of the bay on our boat ride out to the site.  I put it in my speech, which was then an instant hit with the GB folks (apparently moose are relatively rare to see in the area).  Ya moose!

MOOSE!  Prob a 2-3 year old male

Anywho! More hijinx to follow, I'm sure.  Wow, did you know hijinx is actually spelled hijinks?  You learn something every day.  Thanks Blogger spellcheck.  I of course will continue to spell it my way.  Like the time I tried to bring back "whack", or coin a catch phrase ("you're breaking my box!") or am currently trying to make stick: "waking up in the 6's; eating breakfast in the 7's" - like for when you wake up anytime between 6-7 and eat between 7-8.  Another example: "Waking up in the 5's is the worst!" (so true).  Just wait.. it'll stick ;)