Anyone I've spoken to in the past year has surely heard me mention "THE YEAR OF DEBT REPAYMENT", said in a slightly ominous voice, inevitably in conjunction with some complaint about how I can't go out/attend that sporting event/see that concert/go on vacation/upgrade my 2007 wardrobe, buy that nice fill-in-the-blank, etc. etc. In 2012, Jeff and I decided to buckle down and pay off a huge loan we had taken out from the Bank of Brian and Gwen (as my mom named it). My parents have a kick ass line of credit with a prime-ish interest rate, so instead of paying the inevitably higher interest rates offered to those who hold mortgages on two homes, multiple credit cards and student loans (read: Jeff and I!), my mom generously offered to pay off our high interest debts if we paid her back (with interest, obvi), in no set time frame. Shout out to my mom here - she's great!!!! And to my hubs, probably a more private person with his money/business than I am.. whereas I unabashedly told anyone who would listen all year about how skint we were and am now blogging about it in detail. Thanks Jeff! In defense of my blathering, I do hope that I might inspire someone (anyone reading this! not anyone in particular :)) to buckle down and just get 'er paid off if you have a debt that's bugging you.. read on for details!
So. 2012. We buckled down. Hard.
It has been a tough year. There have been times where I've wanted to cry/have cried over the frustration of living on a shoe-stringier-than-usual budget. We've had our disagreements over the best way to spend our paltry amount of "free" money. We put a total hold on home renos & redesign (which we love to do! has been so irritating!!). Jeff tried several low budget (unfortuantely unsuccessful) solutions to fixing his car's radio when the FM radio gave out, and eventually gave in to listening to TALK1010 on his way to and from work on his 35 min each way commute each day (trooper :)). We've filled a grocery cart and then put back things we didn't REALLY need. We have spent many a night pj'd (jp'd) out on the couch, just keeping it close to home to save bucks. I have lived inside an excel spreadsheet called "budget" and worked 2 positions at my job with only minor bellyaching (rising in pitch at times, for sure, though) because the inflated paycheque meant we could e.g. do Christmas right instead of making homemade gifts (which has definitely happened in the past!). Don't get me wrong, we've always been somewhat thrifty (we really stretched ourselves to get into this house), so there were some parts of this year that were old hat for us, but in general 2012 was just a bit pinchier and squinchier than usual, with occasional (frequent?) moments of "AUGGGH I CAN'T DO THIS FOR ANOTHER 11/8/6/4/3 MONTHS!!!!!!".
We found ways to "pretend rich", like the weekend we spent test driving Nissan 370Z's. We do plan to buy one eventually... like in a couple of years.. but the guys at the dealerships didn't need to know that! :D That car goes fast! Weeee!!! We relished gift cards (esp. Red Lobster - thanks Doreen!!!) that were given to us as wedding or birthday gifts, and made big shows of those nights out - lots of anticipation, dressing up nicely to go out, and always reflecting back on how great it was to have had such a great meal for free! And we made plans for 2013, like a 2 week road trip to the east coast. Planning it in 2012 was nearly torturous, wishing we could go right then, but I just kept thinking "it will get here eventually". 2013 seemed like it would never arrive.. but somehow, here I am, New Years Eve eve, and the last cheque to my parents is written and sitting in my dad's hands, dated for Jan 1, 2013. And then we're free and clear!*
*disclaimer: we are not free and clear. we still have 20 years left on a gigantic mortgage, plus lots of little debts tucked here and there, but the payments are totally manageable and the lenders are not close family members who you see frequently and tend to discuss your financial biznatch with on a regular basis over dinner ;)
I'm glad we did it. It was a tough slog for sure, but like with most things that are challenging, they are usually worth it in the end! My mom is convinced we're going to stop seeing her and calling now that we have "no use" for them. She's silly.. they still have that cute dog I love to play with so I'll definitely still visit (HAHA kidding mom). I hope now she will understand how much I value our relationship fully and completely for what it is, not for anything to do with money. But my parents deserve such a huge shout out for supporting me through school (undergrad and post grad), helping me purchase my first home, helping pay for our wedding, giving me random "helps" along the way (e.g. my mom's gift of $ this summer to go buy nice dress pants for myself which I had been refusing to do for 5 years! no doubt she was mortified when I told her I was going to be doing an acting manager job and wearing 5 year old dress pants for my occasional fancy meetings - my goodness!! ;)) and most of all this debt situation which has been countless thousands of dollars over 3.5 years. They are simply the best and I hope their spirit of generosity is something I can incorporate into my own life. This may be easier now that I'm at a point in my life where I don't have to shed tears if the dinner/grocery/gas/hydro bill is more than I budgeted for.... (frequent, frequent happening! .. the bills.. not the tears.. well.... :P).
And, as with many things in life, when it rains, it pours! Jeff's investment property in Stratford (the house he lived in when he met me that he was never able to sell after I wooed him east to Guelph to live with me) which has caused him much grief and headache, and our budget much fluctuation and red periods over the past 4 years, finally sold, just this past month (closes March 1, 2013). Finally, the blood/tears/sweat equity that Jeff has truly earned by being a reluctant landlord in a town full of ruffian renters will be in our bank account and Jeff never has to go to Stratford again (his request - he said maybe we can go see a play there somtime but not until at least 2018 when the post-traumatic landlord disorder wears off). In addition, our mortgage renewal unexpectedly turned up in the mail this month (I mistakenly thought our 5 year term had reset when we moved in here 3 years ago.. turns out it was 5 years from the start of the term which was Jan 2008 - booya!) and we were able to grab a great rate from RBC (figured I'd plug them.. they have been super!) of 2.99% for a 5 year fixed. Since I secured my original mortgage in late 2007 (happy economy = interest rate of 5.89% = aggh!), blended it in 2010 when we moved (recovering-ish economy - rate blended to about 4.8%) and didn't think I'd ever be able to take advantage of today's sweet interest rates, missing them entirely until it was time to renew in 2015, I am pretty stoked! We are going to try to pay down an extra chunk of the m-gage each year to try make a dent in the principle (do you ever look at that interest/principle summary at year end?? omg.. terrifying how much goes to interest!), but it's nice to know that those nasty monthly payments will be even lower than we'd planned for the next year (and the next 5!).
So what now? I am going to bid farewell to Gail Vaz-Oxlade, host of 'Til Debt Do Us Part, and my personal guru for tough love, budgets and debt repayment. I am going to tuck away my chequebook and pen and write no more cheques to the Bank of Brian and Gwen. I am going to eagerly await a lifetime of travelling that starts with our east coast roadie in August. I am going to try to LOOK AWAY from my budget (I still have one for 2013, but this budget has some magic built in that I call "wiggle room"!!!).
For the first time last night, when I got a dinner bill that was crazy expensive (I blame the stout-drinkin' boozer I married!), I leaned over and whispered to Jeff: "it's ridiculously expensive. and I don't care." with a huge grin. Cheers to loosening the purse strings, loosening the belt, unfurrowing my brow, taking a big deep sigh of relief and saying GOOD-FREAKING-BYE to 2012 and The Year of Debt Repayment.
Cheers to 2013, a happy new year indeed! :)
Monday 31 December 2012
Friday 14 December 2012
Crazy Sleeper
I am beyond a crazy sleeper - I'm an out and out nutcase. Let's revisit some of the ridiculous things that I've experienced or had reported back to me from my attempts to catch 8 hours of shut eye a night.
Sleep Walking
Starting when I was very young, I began occasionally wandering around in my sleep. I usually have little to no recollection of these incidents. One night, I wandered into my family's office where my mom was working an overnight on call shift. I said "hi mommy" and she said "hi sweetie - what are you doing up? can you get me a diet pepsi?" (always thinking of me first eh) and I said "sure!". Then she never saw me again, and found me fast asleep in my bed about 15 minutes later when she wandered out in a thirsty haze.
Sleep Talking
This is my crowning and key characteristic. I don't get as many stories now because Jeff sleeps like he's dead (once he slept through a policeman pounding on our door and ringing our doorbell at 3 in the morning - oh don't worry, it was our trashy neighbours they were after, not us) so he doesn't hear a lot. But occasionally the intensity of my episodes has woken him up. I don't even know where to start. Those overnight on call shifts were when my mom realized I had issues - she'd hear my non-sensical mumblings from the next room and tease me about them the next day. When I had sleepovers with my friends in high school, Dawn and Jana would always leave a pen out so they could scribble down what I said during the night. Some gems we still laugh about today: "can we have steak for breakfast?" "today's too cloudy for the teddy bears to have their picnic" or Jana's favourite, the time that I bolted upright in bed, pointing, eyes wide open, screaming to no one "stop! you're going to get me in trouble! put that down!". ('You're going to get me in trouble' has been a nonstop theme in my sleep talking episodes as long as I can remember - concerning). I had an old boyfriend who I used to wake up with my talking who would engage me in conversations while I was asleep - my answers would grow increasingly more angry until I exploded awake yelling a bunch of nonsense just to find him laughing hysterically. Recently I dove out of bed screaming to Jeff that no one cares about black bear safety except Lou and I (Lou is a nice older man who donated some land to my organization.. talk about taking your work home with you). For a long time I've been having long, loud and often angry chats while asleep and the weirdest thing is they never have anything to do with my dreams - so where do they come from?!
Dreams
My dreams are a blog entry in themselves. I dream every single night and can usually remember at least 1-3 dreams/night. Last night I had a dream about the Christmas Bird Count I'm participating in on Sunday, which starts at 5:45 a.m. on Sunday morning. In my dream, I was about 15 minutes late getting there, and I saw my group packing up and getting into their cars. I asked for an update and they reported "you're too late. we've already seen every Ontario bird and recorded them, even though it's still dark out. we're going home now." I was devestated. This is just an "off the top of my head" example. I have dreamt about everything, everyone, in every scenario you can imagine. I realize that sounds dirty - no worries, go there.. I've been there (you've probably been there with me!! HA!). But it's mainly the VIVIDITY of my dreams that disturbs me. I often wake up convinced that these ridiculous soap operas I write in my head in my sleep are true and many of my friends and family have woken up to me inquiring about whether they were a) mad at me b) still alive c) ok or whether their a) horses had been stolen b) father had died c) fill in any blank here, I've done it. I've been mad at Jeff for entire days about things he's done to me in my dreams, including a super weird stretch after we got engaged in which he left me for about a million different reasons (they completely stopped after we got married - weeeird!!). In high school I ended a relationship over a realization I made in a dream - I KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT SOUNDS! The weirdest thing in the past few years, though, has been my dreams coming true (honestly, read on, I'm not bs-ing). It started with an old coworker who wore a hat to the office every single day for the 8-9 months I'd known him. I had a dream about him and in the dream he was sitting in his office, we were talking about his upcoming wedding, and he wasn't wearing a hat. The next morning, I was telling this dream to another coworker when the hat-wearer walked into the office. I stared, openmouthed at him, as I watched him walk past ("uhh.. morning, Kristyn..") because he WASN'T WEARING A HAT. What the eff? Then, just last week I had a dream that I was arguing about the merit of cheesy wedding songs and how the Macarena wasn't a good one, and I thought it should be succeeded by Mambo #5 (an old favourite of mine from high school that I haven't heard in probably a year). I woke up before my alarm that morning, turned on the radio as I got up, was brushing my teeth and the next song that came on was Mambo #5. Now, if only I could dream the winning lottery numbers...
Sleep Arranging
I become extremely determined about certain things in my sleep and set to work. In grade 12, while half asleep (I have vague memories of feeling quite set about my task) I made myself a nice bed of blankets on the floor, turned my shirt around backwards, put on some jeans (didn't zip them up) and went to sleep on the floor. I woke up that morning in utter confusion. When I was away on my first road trip for my current job, perhaps buoyed up by the excitement of travelling (ha 2009 Kristyn.. ha), I woke up in my hotel room the morning I was leaving to find my toiletries neatly rearranged on the floor beside the bed, moved carefully off the nightstand by, I presume, me. In my last house I have blurry memories of being convinced that Pam and James were coming to sleep over and I had to turn down the covers on the bed in the guest room, NOW! I did a double take when I passed the guest room the next day, then could just slightly remember my fervent hospitality from the middle of the previous night.
Hallucinating
Ah, my favourite. I'm not as bad as my friend James who has seen pretty much every piece of spy equipment in his bedroom (through the mirror, sneaking through the vents) and hallucinated his cats into interesting scenarios, BUT I've done my share of hallucinating. The time I could SEE moths fluttering against a motel window, even after I woke up - only to blink a few times, have them disappear and hear pattering rain outside which sounded like fluttering wings. The time I looked down and SAW an acquaintance of mine sleeping on the floor of my bedroom in my old apartment, and, I sleeping in the buff, found this arrangement highly inappropriate. I tore a blanket off the bed to cover myself, ran out of the room in a panic and found myself frantically panting in the living room, realizing there was no one in my room. Jeff caught me a few months back pawing at the air below the ceiling fan, trying to turn on the light (there are no strings, it's controlled by a remote) and that damn fan has been so many things on so many nights, most recently helicopter blades a la PTSD Owen in Grey's Anatomy. Terrifying. Hallucinations are NOT fun!, but do make for extreme hilarity.
Is it any wonder I need 8-9 hours of sleep a night considering how much I have GOING ON every night?!
I'll leave it at that for now, hopefully having left you more grateful for your peaceful nights and easy breezy sleeps... next time you wake up after a restful 8 hours, think of me.. huddled in the corner.. swatting away moths.. and throwin' on some jeans...
Sleep Walking
Starting when I was very young, I began occasionally wandering around in my sleep. I usually have little to no recollection of these incidents. One night, I wandered into my family's office where my mom was working an overnight on call shift. I said "hi mommy" and she said "hi sweetie - what are you doing up? can you get me a diet pepsi?" (always thinking of me first eh) and I said "sure!". Then she never saw me again, and found me fast asleep in my bed about 15 minutes later when she wandered out in a thirsty haze.
Sleep Talking
This is my crowning and key characteristic. I don't get as many stories now because Jeff sleeps like he's dead (once he slept through a policeman pounding on our door and ringing our doorbell at 3 in the morning - oh don't worry, it was our trashy neighbours they were after, not us) so he doesn't hear a lot. But occasionally the intensity of my episodes has woken him up. I don't even know where to start. Those overnight on call shifts were when my mom realized I had issues - she'd hear my non-sensical mumblings from the next room and tease me about them the next day. When I had sleepovers with my friends in high school, Dawn and Jana would always leave a pen out so they could scribble down what I said during the night. Some gems we still laugh about today: "can we have steak for breakfast?" "today's too cloudy for the teddy bears to have their picnic" or Jana's favourite, the time that I bolted upright in bed, pointing, eyes wide open, screaming to no one "stop! you're going to get me in trouble! put that down!". ('You're going to get me in trouble' has been a nonstop theme in my sleep talking episodes as long as I can remember - concerning). I had an old boyfriend who I used to wake up with my talking who would engage me in conversations while I was asleep - my answers would grow increasingly more angry until I exploded awake yelling a bunch of nonsense just to find him laughing hysterically. Recently I dove out of bed screaming to Jeff that no one cares about black bear safety except Lou and I (Lou is a nice older man who donated some land to my organization.. talk about taking your work home with you). For a long time I've been having long, loud and often angry chats while asleep and the weirdest thing is they never have anything to do with my dreams - so where do they come from?!
Dreams
My dreams are a blog entry in themselves. I dream every single night and can usually remember at least 1-3 dreams/night. Last night I had a dream about the Christmas Bird Count I'm participating in on Sunday, which starts at 5:45 a.m. on Sunday morning. In my dream, I was about 15 minutes late getting there, and I saw my group packing up and getting into their cars. I asked for an update and they reported "you're too late. we've already seen every Ontario bird and recorded them, even though it's still dark out. we're going home now." I was devestated. This is just an "off the top of my head" example. I have dreamt about everything, everyone, in every scenario you can imagine. I realize that sounds dirty - no worries, go there.. I've been there (you've probably been there with me!! HA!). But it's mainly the VIVIDITY of my dreams that disturbs me. I often wake up convinced that these ridiculous soap operas I write in my head in my sleep are true and many of my friends and family have woken up to me inquiring about whether they were a) mad at me b) still alive c) ok or whether their a) horses had been stolen b) father had died c) fill in any blank here, I've done it. I've been mad at Jeff for entire days about things he's done to me in my dreams, including a super weird stretch after we got engaged in which he left me for about a million different reasons (they completely stopped after we got married - weeeird!!). In high school I ended a relationship over a realization I made in a dream - I KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT SOUNDS! The weirdest thing in the past few years, though, has been my dreams coming true (honestly, read on, I'm not bs-ing). It started with an old coworker who wore a hat to the office every single day for the 8-9 months I'd known him. I had a dream about him and in the dream he was sitting in his office, we were talking about his upcoming wedding, and he wasn't wearing a hat. The next morning, I was telling this dream to another coworker when the hat-wearer walked into the office. I stared, openmouthed at him, as I watched him walk past ("uhh.. morning, Kristyn..") because he WASN'T WEARING A HAT. What the eff? Then, just last week I had a dream that I was arguing about the merit of cheesy wedding songs and how the Macarena wasn't a good one, and I thought it should be succeeded by Mambo #5 (an old favourite of mine from high school that I haven't heard in probably a year). I woke up before my alarm that morning, turned on the radio as I got up, was brushing my teeth and the next song that came on was Mambo #5. Now, if only I could dream the winning lottery numbers...
Sleep Arranging
I become extremely determined about certain things in my sleep and set to work. In grade 12, while half asleep (I have vague memories of feeling quite set about my task) I made myself a nice bed of blankets on the floor, turned my shirt around backwards, put on some jeans (didn't zip them up) and went to sleep on the floor. I woke up that morning in utter confusion. When I was away on my first road trip for my current job, perhaps buoyed up by the excitement of travelling (ha 2009 Kristyn.. ha), I woke up in my hotel room the morning I was leaving to find my toiletries neatly rearranged on the floor beside the bed, moved carefully off the nightstand by, I presume, me. In my last house I have blurry memories of being convinced that Pam and James were coming to sleep over and I had to turn down the covers on the bed in the guest room, NOW! I did a double take when I passed the guest room the next day, then could just slightly remember my fervent hospitality from the middle of the previous night.
Hallucinating
Ah, my favourite. I'm not as bad as my friend James who has seen pretty much every piece of spy equipment in his bedroom (through the mirror, sneaking through the vents) and hallucinated his cats into interesting scenarios, BUT I've done my share of hallucinating. The time I could SEE moths fluttering against a motel window, even after I woke up - only to blink a few times, have them disappear and hear pattering rain outside which sounded like fluttering wings. The time I looked down and SAW an acquaintance of mine sleeping on the floor of my bedroom in my old apartment, and, I sleeping in the buff, found this arrangement highly inappropriate. I tore a blanket off the bed to cover myself, ran out of the room in a panic and found myself frantically panting in the living room, realizing there was no one in my room. Jeff caught me a few months back pawing at the air below the ceiling fan, trying to turn on the light (there are no strings, it's controlled by a remote) and that damn fan has been so many things on so many nights, most recently helicopter blades a la PTSD Owen in Grey's Anatomy. Terrifying. Hallucinations are NOT fun!, but do make for extreme hilarity.
Is it any wonder I need 8-9 hours of sleep a night considering how much I have GOING ON every night?!
I'll leave it at that for now, hopefully having left you more grateful for your peaceful nights and easy breezy sleeps... next time you wake up after a restful 8 hours, think of me.. huddled in the corner.. swatting away moths.. and throwin' on some jeans...
Saturday 1 December 2012
Crowd surfing
EEP! I missed a blog entry for November. Even though life has been crazy trying to hold down 2 jobs for the past 5 months I promised myself I'd blog at least once a month - it's fun sharing my random thoughts, feelings, lists, secrets, analyses and most of all stories about me doing stupid things or ending up in ridiculous, usually unbelievable situations. There are more of those to come. This time I wanted to feature the top 5 reasons why I love where I work. AND GUESS WHAT - the answers have absolutely nothing to do with trees, nature, doing work I feel good about or any of that other blathery mush. We just had our bi-annual (I can never remember if that means twice a year, or every two years.. every 2 years is what I mean) national staff gathering where 220 people from across Canada including our president, all the VPs, several board members and awesome external speakers (e.g. Chief Scientist from the world's largest conservation organization) got together to celebrate our work and ourselves. Here's my Top 5 about why I love where I work:
1. We had a talent show on Wednesday night which featured at least 4 coordinated sing-a-longs making fun of all the acronyms we use in our daily work (Jeff says it's like I am speaking in code sometimes). Personally, I participated in a song to the tune of "TNT" which sang "PMP! It's dynamite! PMP! We'll win the fight! PMP! Block off that road! PMP! We're saving a toaaaaddddd!!!!" Oi! :) At one point our new land management database was likened to a hungry monster trying to eat all of our work - a Quebec staff was dressed in a scary monster mask and growling and yelling while the two staff who built and manage the database tried to hold it back and whip it into submission. I cried laughing. A few staff from our Quebec region did a dramatic reenactment of the Backstreet Boys' video "Get Down" which brought me right back to Grade 9, Friday night, watching MuchMusic in my basement with Dawn! Loved!!! My coworker Laura wrote a fantastic choir song lamenting everything people hate about our organization "why is National trying to control me!?" "why do I have to get out a calculator for the Net Amount After Tax Recovery on the Invoice Coding Form- it's an Excel spreadsheet!!!!!" - double loved!
2. We did a short version of the Briggs-Meyers personality test during a session on Thursday and a few people were invited to share their answers to the telling questions that help you determine which category you fall into. A cartoon of an apple popped up on the screen and the woman leading the session said "describe it". I wrote "apple" (I am heavily a "sensate", not someone who sees things with intuition - if I was I would have said "healthy" or "autumn"). As she's surveying the room, one of our National VPs replies "global". GLOBAL?! Wtf. I spent the most of the rest of the day telling people I was concerned he needed to speak to a psychiatrist. That night around 2:30 a.m. he said to a few of us over our 8th (or 20th) drink: "I really wish I hadn't said 'global'. It was what I was thinking, but now people keep looking at me really strangely. Either they think I'm a pscychopath, or that I'm the f***ing messiah!". Again, I laughed until I cried.
3. I got to present a "brag book" for Ontario region's successes over the past little while. My old boss Dan and I were tagged to give the presentation. We were told to be competitive with the other regions. Dan and I, without any planning, managed a choreographed entrance onto the stage which involved running, raising the roof hands, a well-timed, surprise high five and during the second iteration of the presentation Dan had us dance up on stage to the Black Eyed Peas (he's in his 40s and has kids, so I'll forgive him if Boom Boom Pow is his #1 badass song). Ontario unofficially "won" the brag book session, largely due to our exuberance, or possibly because when I told the story of fundraising for money for a boat to access a remote island property, Dan concluded my slide with "we're on a boat" and a sage nod.
4. On Wednesday night we danced. Oh did we dance. I quickly lost the sweater and styled hair and was reduced a t-shirt and ponytail and was STILL too hot! We danced from about 9:00 p.m. on, some of us giving up around 12:45 (me) and some lasting until 4:00 a.m. - whoooo!!! For some reason Gangnam Style was played twice, and for some reason, at least 25 of my coworkers know every move to the dance including the funny leg kick. At one point my aforementioned old boss who usually doesn't partake in the dancing grabbed my our colleague Kelly from Alberta, locked elbows with her back-to-back and flipped her over his back. My absolute shock was quelled when Dan and Kelly performed this for a second, then a third time. This year, our president and CEO did not do a handstand, but I hope we'll revisit the glory of 2010 another time. At the end of the night, a small crowd formed around the stage and that's when the crowd-surfing began. No, I did not crowd surf. It was later pointed out to me that it was SLIGHTLY awkward having your hands on a coworker's ass (my sentiments exactly) but I guess enough beers will take the edge off anything! :) My feet were throbbing when I went to bed, but I couldn't stop smiling at how much fun it had been!
5. There was a session given by an external speaker on "Business Etiquette", which I did not sign up for (I think I laughed at it when I saw it on the agenda - I wear jeans to work every day, tank tops and flip flops in the summer because our building has no a/c, and forward all spam emails offering Russian brides or poorly worded offers for college deeplomas to my coworkers - I am informal person through to my heart and that will never change!). I got a full report on it though - the woman giving the talk was advising never to be friends with your coworkers (they're your coworkers, NOT your friends!!) - definitely don't ever hug your coworkers, a firm handshake will suffice, and don't ask people "how are you?", but rather "are you enjoying the staff conference? how did you enjoy the meal?". UGH! Well "ugh" is apparently what a bunch of folks thought, because my one coworker (FRIEND!) Brenda put her hand up and said "are you really saying we shouldn't be hugging, dancing or crowd surfing on our coworkers? Because I have done all those things this week." The woman said "you should absolutely not have done any of those things." In return, the entire room started speaking out of turn: "but our organizational culture is NOT like a corporation! that's how we bond!" "our president hugs people! my boss hugs me!" "we love each other and want to celebrate being together!" - I picture it like a mutiny and the woman having balled up paper thrown at her until she eventually slunk out of the room. I'm sure it was more professional than that (mildly) but I was happy to hear people sticking up for what I think we're really all about.
And to conclude, the fact that the jokes and drinks never stopped all week long throw a lovely blanket over the entire week and all the reasons I love working where I do. Anytime I'm laughing hysterically where I need to bend down to the floor to catch my breath means I'm probably having a pretty good week. Oh, and I got to hold a baby Spotted Turtle which was part of the herptile display - a-MA-zing! Already excited to do it all again in 2014!
1. We had a talent show on Wednesday night which featured at least 4 coordinated sing-a-longs making fun of all the acronyms we use in our daily work (Jeff says it's like I am speaking in code sometimes). Personally, I participated in a song to the tune of "TNT" which sang "PMP! It's dynamite! PMP! We'll win the fight! PMP! Block off that road! PMP! We're saving a toaaaaddddd!!!!" Oi! :) At one point our new land management database was likened to a hungry monster trying to eat all of our work - a Quebec staff was dressed in a scary monster mask and growling and yelling while the two staff who built and manage the database tried to hold it back and whip it into submission. I cried laughing. A few staff from our Quebec region did a dramatic reenactment of the Backstreet Boys' video "Get Down" which brought me right back to Grade 9, Friday night, watching MuchMusic in my basement with Dawn! Loved!!! My coworker Laura wrote a fantastic choir song lamenting everything people hate about our organization "why is National trying to control me!?" "why do I have to get out a calculator for the Net Amount After Tax Recovery on the Invoice Coding Form- it's an Excel spreadsheet!!!!!" - double loved!
2. We did a short version of the Briggs-Meyers personality test during a session on Thursday and a few people were invited to share their answers to the telling questions that help you determine which category you fall into. A cartoon of an apple popped up on the screen and the woman leading the session said "describe it". I wrote "apple" (I am heavily a "sensate", not someone who sees things with intuition - if I was I would have said "healthy" or "autumn"). As she's surveying the room, one of our National VPs replies "global". GLOBAL?! Wtf. I spent the most of the rest of the day telling people I was concerned he needed to speak to a psychiatrist. That night around 2:30 a.m. he said to a few of us over our 8th (or 20th) drink: "I really wish I hadn't said 'global'. It was what I was thinking, but now people keep looking at me really strangely. Either they think I'm a pscychopath, or that I'm the f***ing messiah!". Again, I laughed until I cried.
3. I got to present a "brag book" for Ontario region's successes over the past little while. My old boss Dan and I were tagged to give the presentation. We were told to be competitive with the other regions. Dan and I, without any planning, managed a choreographed entrance onto the stage which involved running, raising the roof hands, a well-timed, surprise high five and during the second iteration of the presentation Dan had us dance up on stage to the Black Eyed Peas (he's in his 40s and has kids, so I'll forgive him if Boom Boom Pow is his #1 badass song). Ontario unofficially "won" the brag book session, largely due to our exuberance, or possibly because when I told the story of fundraising for money for a boat to access a remote island property, Dan concluded my slide with "we're on a boat" and a sage nod.
4. On Wednesday night we danced. Oh did we dance. I quickly lost the sweater and styled hair and was reduced a t-shirt and ponytail and was STILL too hot! We danced from about 9:00 p.m. on, some of us giving up around 12:45 (me) and some lasting until 4:00 a.m. - whoooo!!! For some reason Gangnam Style was played twice, and for some reason, at least 25 of my coworkers know every move to the dance including the funny leg kick. At one point my aforementioned old boss who usually doesn't partake in the dancing grabbed my our colleague Kelly from Alberta, locked elbows with her back-to-back and flipped her over his back. My absolute shock was quelled when Dan and Kelly performed this for a second, then a third time. This year, our president and CEO did not do a handstand, but I hope we'll revisit the glory of 2010 another time. At the end of the night, a small crowd formed around the stage and that's when the crowd-surfing began. No, I did not crowd surf. It was later pointed out to me that it was SLIGHTLY awkward having your hands on a coworker's ass (my sentiments exactly) but I guess enough beers will take the edge off anything! :) My feet were throbbing when I went to bed, but I couldn't stop smiling at how much fun it had been!
5. There was a session given by an external speaker on "Business Etiquette", which I did not sign up for (I think I laughed at it when I saw it on the agenda - I wear jeans to work every day, tank tops and flip flops in the summer because our building has no a/c, and forward all spam emails offering Russian brides or poorly worded offers for college deeplomas to my coworkers - I am informal person through to my heart and that will never change!). I got a full report on it though - the woman giving the talk was advising never to be friends with your coworkers (they're your coworkers, NOT your friends!!) - definitely don't ever hug your coworkers, a firm handshake will suffice, and don't ask people "how are you?", but rather "are you enjoying the staff conference? how did you enjoy the meal?". UGH! Well "ugh" is apparently what a bunch of folks thought, because my one coworker (FRIEND!) Brenda put her hand up and said "are you really saying we shouldn't be hugging, dancing or crowd surfing on our coworkers? Because I have done all those things this week." The woman said "you should absolutely not have done any of those things." In return, the entire room started speaking out of turn: "but our organizational culture is NOT like a corporation! that's how we bond!" "our president hugs people! my boss hugs me!" "we love each other and want to celebrate being together!" - I picture it like a mutiny and the woman having balled up paper thrown at her until she eventually slunk out of the room. I'm sure it was more professional than that (mildly) but I was happy to hear people sticking up for what I think we're really all about.
And to conclude, the fact that the jokes and drinks never stopped all week long throw a lovely blanket over the entire week and all the reasons I love working where I do. Anytime I'm laughing hysterically where I need to bend down to the floor to catch my breath means I'm probably having a pretty good week. Oh, and I got to hold a baby Spotted Turtle which was part of the herptile display - a-MA-zing! Already excited to do it all again in 2014!
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